Keeping Calm During Purple Crying
And When + How to Take a Break
Many of us feel overwhelmed in the postpartum period. It's common to experience guilt and shame when we feel overwhelmed or overstimulated with a new baby, which can be very isolating. This is a quick reminder that you are doing great, welcoming a baby to the family is a lot of change at once. You are NOT a bad mom, if you’re having trouble adjusting to this HUGE new role you’re in.
The postpartum struggle is REAL…
I struggled with feeling isolated and inadequate when I was unable to soothe my newborn at times. I found myself texting friends or my spouse, asking for permission to take a break from my baby when I felt overwhelmed; though I knew this was the right thing to do, it still felt “wrong”. However, placing my baby in their crib and walking away to take a breather during those first few months when crying seemed never to end was necessary. After allowing myself these short periods to recoup, I found that my battery was recharged enough to care for my child safely.
You may have heard of PURPLE crying or “The period of PURPLE crying” which is a period of intense crying in a newborn that can often lead to distress in caregivers. Here, we will explore PURPLE crying and some ways to handle it safely while caring for our babies and ourselves.
What is the origin of PURPLE crying?
PURPLE is an acronym coined by Dr. Barr, a pediatric developmental specialist who developed a program known as the “Period of PURPLE Crying”. The concept was developed to help parents understand that intense crying during this time is normal and will eventually pass. The goal of PURPLE crying is to support parents and prevent shaken baby syndrome, abusive head trauma, and other forms of infant abuse.
What does PURPLE stand for?
Peak of crying: Your baby may cry more each week, the most at 2 months, then less at 3-5 months.
Unexpected: Crying can come and go, and you don't know why.
Resists soothing: Your baby may not stop crying no matter what you try.
Pain-like face: A crying baby may look like they are in pain, even when they are not.
Long-lasting: Crying can last as much as 5 hours or more daily.
Evening: Your baby may cry more in the late afternoon and evening.
Soothing Strategies for Baby
Quick Check: does baby need a diaper change, is baby too hot or too cold, does baby need a feed?
5 S’s
A set of techniques developed by pediatrician Dr. Harvey Karp to help soothe and comfort a crying baby.
1. Swaddling: Wrapping the baby snugly in a blanket to provide a sense of security and warmth.
2. Side/Stomach Position: Holding the baby on their side or stomach. This position can help calm them. Note - babies should always be placed on their back to sleep to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
3. Shushing/Sound: Making a loud "shh" sound near the baby's ear. You can also try brown noise or gentle music.
4. Swinging: Gently rocking or swinging the baby to create rhythmic, calming movements.
5. Sucking: Allowing the baby to suck on something, such as a pacifier, finger, or breast, which can be very soothing.
Give baby a warm bath
Step outside with baby (or go for a walk), if weather permits
Never shake your baby, no matter how frustrated you get. This can cause lifelong brain damage and permanent disability or even death of your child.
Soothing Strategies for YOU
Call/text family or a friend
Place baby in an empty and safe crib. Close the door. Walk away for a few minutes.
If able, take a step outside for some fresh air.
You can bring your baby monitor with the volume off if this comforts you.
Square Breathing
How to:
1 – Inhale for 4 seconds
2 – Hold breath for 4 seconds
3 – Exhale for 4 seconds
4 – Rest for 4 seconds
Save this graphic or screenshot for when you are feeling overwhelmed, overstimulated, or anxious.
Parental cry it out - crying is OK, feeling is OK!
Parental Resources
Postpartum Support International (https://www.postpartum.net/get-help/) has Hotlines, Helplines and an App available for support.
Thrive After Baby- postpartum counseling HERE
Remember, this is a normal developmental phase that WILL end. You are not alone, and help is always available. We see you, parents. <3
With love,
Jackie & Kaylee
